Oh really, I don’t think so

As I am reading for my research, I came across an article that said the women’s movement is the reason why women do not have great friendships with each other anymore. The rationale behind it is that, before the women’s movement women were taught by their mothers how to be a woman which meant cooking, cleaning and taking care of the kids. With that being said one of the only reasons for women’s friendship to decline and become so combative is because the women’s movement began to occur. Now this is complete nonsense.  I just had to stare at the pages for a while before I could completely digest this nonsense.  Although the article is quite old, it is still perplexing that someone would assume that the women’s movement is the reason behind the negative perception of women’s friendships.  It is amazing what people were able to publish back in the day.I know research has to begin somewhere but dang this is a rocky and offensive start.  I know you have to find something or someone to blame change on, but to blame an entire movement for the state of women’s friendships, really that is CRAZY.

I am happy this article is old but to know that people really felt like that gets under my skin. I will leave the article along now.

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Black women friendships

As I am continuing my research for my thesis, it has come to my attention that for as many Black women who say they don’t have females friends their are twice as many that do. Being one of those people who have quite a few female friends, who are mostly Black I find comfort in this. I find comfort in knowing that although everyone has had that one bad experience with another Black woman that has not stopped them from writing off all Black women. As I am conducting research for a smaller study for my thesis, I have to ask people specifically do they have a black girl friend and a black best girl friend. Some say yes and others are like no. For the people who do not have that close relationship with other Black women, I ask them who do they talk to about racism and some of the racist things that go on around campus. Once that question is asked they always think of a close Black girl friend but would not really consider her a friend for real. Well at least you have someone to talk to that understands.
I hope that as I continue this study that I will be able to show people that Black women are able to have close intimate relationships, as opposed to the stuff that you see on television. The relationship may not be peaches and creme but it is not always hell on wheels either.
Until we meet again, I wish every Black female friendship so much love!!!!!

Friends, we all have them


As I begin working on my thesis, I have decided to blog about my topic. I am looking at African-American women friendships with each other. If you look at the portrayals of Black women friendships you are only given the negative portrayals. I have always known that some friendships are horrible but some are quite the contrary. Some are very positive without all of the arguing and negativity that is seen. I think of Oprah and Gayle and Tiny and Toya and I am able to see the positive relationships that Black women are able to have with one another. Basketball wives just puts a damper in my spirit when I see all of the negativity and the fact that people are drawn to that is a serious problem. My research wishes to show a side of friendship that is rarely seen in the African-American community, the side where we actually get along. Black women are able to have positive relationships with each other without all of the bickering, gossiping, backstabbing and fighting and my mission is to show that it is happening and we just don’t get to see it. Real friendships between Black women are possible regardless of what is on TV and in the media.